23 September 2012

Spurious Tripe

Another thing that is being largely counterfeited is tripe. Parties who buy tripe cannot be too careful. There is a manufactory that can make tripe so natural that no person on earth can detect the deception.

They take a large sheet of rubber about a sixteenth of an inch thick for a background, and by a process only known to themselves veneer it with a Turkish towel, and put it in brine to soak. The unsuspecting boarding house keeper, or restaurant man buys it and cooks it, and the boarder or transient guest calls for tripe. A piece is cut off the damnable tripe with a pair of shears used in a tin shop for cutting sheet iron, and it is handed to the victim. He tries to cut it, and fails; he tries to gnaw it off, and if he succeeds in getting a mouthful, that settles him. He leaves his tripe on his plate, and it is gathered up and sewed on the original piece, and is kept for another banquet.

George W. Peck, Peck's Compendium of Fun

Painting: Johannes Vermeer, Girl with a Wine Glass

Spurious: adj. 1) False or fake, 2) Apparently but not actually valid

Tripe: n. 1) Nonsense, rubbish 2) The first or second stomach of a cow or other ruminant used as food.



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